Black Collegian News & Views

Long distance relationships are popular among students on college campuses for a variety of reasons. Some leave behind that special someone when they attend college away from home. Others may have met while at college and because they are from different places, they may spend their summers and other breaks from school apart. Whatever the reason for the distance, these relationships force students to deal with some serious issues. Can they remain focused in school? Can these relationships work? If so, how?

For some, performance in school is reflective of the state of their relationship. Frank Collaso, M.S.W., a counselor at Xavier University says, “Long distance relationships could affect the student's academic performance. When students are in a secure, healthy relationship, they tend to be more focused, and they're able to focus on their academics.” However, on the downside, Collaso pointed out that if a student is involved in an unhealthy relationship, this might leave the student feeling concerned about his/her partner and not focusing as much on academics.

Many students on Xavier University’s campus, like many students on other college campuses, experience being away from their partners. When students were asked to give their opinions on long distance relationships, most spoke of the positive aspects of being away, often saying that the best part about being in a long distance relationship is the reunions. Though reunions are a bright spot, what matters is the day to day while students are apart. They’ll only get through that if both parties are certain that the relationship that they’re involved in is the relationship that they want. “A lot of people say long distance relationships don’t work, but if both individuals want the relationship to work, then it will,” says Lauren Womack, a Political Science major.

There are many factors that must be involved in a relationship, for it to grow and become productive. When asked what those factors are, almost everyone agreed that trust and communication are among the most important. “Long distance relationships are cool, as long as there is love, trust, and communication,” says Derrick Bates, a Computer Science major. Like Bates, many believe that love is the key to a healthy relationship. Celeste Parker, a Speech Pathology major, stated that as long there is complete trust and good communication, the relationship could work.

After time passes and you’re away from your partner for a long period of time, the relationship can become trying, but there are many factors that can make the distance bearable. Knowing that your partner is only a phone call away when you want to hear his/her voice gives a great sense of security in a relationship. Students also keep in touch and save money by using email. Many students travel home on the weekends to spend time with their partner or take trips together over the holidays. “At times it can get hard, but then I realize what I have and I’m reassured how strong our relationship is,” says Patrice McKinney, a Psychology major. Other students, who view their relationships as McKinney, asserted that all the effort they put into their relationships is truly worth it.

It’s important that students prioritize their lives and choose only what is healthy for them. In any relationship, it’s important to make sure that it works to the benefit of both people involved. Long distance relationships can be difficult but they can be equally rewarding. When it’s determined that this is a good situation to be in, students are then tasked with the challenge of making it work. We learn a lot in college that goes beyond the classroom and these relationships afford us yet another opportunity to continue learning.

Nikia L. Byers is a sophomore at Xavier University in Louisiana where she’s majoring in Communications and Psychology. Nikia also serves as Managing Editor of the Xavier Herald.