Handling Self-doubt & the Fear of Failure

By Chaz Kyser, Special to THE BLACK COLLEGIAN

When you are overcome with self-doubt and the fear of failure you can become a barrier to your success. That frustrated voice inside your head that tells you the goals you’re working towards can’t be accomplished, and you’re not good enough, smart enough, attractive enough, talented enough, or man or woman enough to accomplish them anyway, can be more detrimental to your livelihood than racism, sexism and ageism combined.

Feelings of self-doubt and the fear of failure aren’t foreign to anyone. These two cousins of discouragement strike people at various points in their lives, usually when there is something they’re hoping to achieve.

These negative feelings are what kept many of your high school classmates from going to college. They caused some of the people who entered college with you to drop out. Self-doubt and the fear of failure even managed to keep students who stayed in college from majoring in what they wanted to because they felt the classes would be too hard for them. What have the spirits of self-doubt and the fear of failure kept you from accomplishing thus far?

If you’re not careful, you can sabotage your career by letting self-doubt and the fear of failure take control of your mind. They’re sneaky and always waiting for an opportunity to do you harm. It doesn’t matter whether the opportunity is big or small. Self-doubt and the fear of failure will keep you from applying for a position because it may be too difficult. Self-doubt and the fear of failure will stop you from trying to move up in a company because you might not fit in with management. If you allow them to, self-doubt and the fear of failure will talk you out of pursuing the career you dreamed of since you were a child because of your skin color and gender. They’ll come up with a thousand reasons on why you can’t and shouldn’t attempt something to further your career as they destroy it in the process. Their scheming never stops. So while opportunity after opportunity may knock at your door, you may never hear it because self-doubt and the fear of failure are clogging your ears with nonsense.

If the spirits of self-doubt and the fear of failure are working in your life it’s time they found another home. The belief that you can do anything you set your mind to is not a pipe dream. The belief that everyone else is capable of living out their dreams is.

Ridding yourself these faceless barriers is not an easy task, but it can be done. Once you’re able to release yourself from their grasp it becomes easier to keep them from interfering in your life again.

Casting Self-Doubt & the Fear of Failure Out of Your Life

Step 1: Acknowledge that self-doubt & the fear of failure are sabotaging you: Self-doubt and the fear of failure are powerful because we deny they exist. We don’t want to believe that sometimes we’re the only ones holding ourselves back. It’s much easier for us to place blame on others. After we’ve run out of scapegoats we make up lame excuses to explain why we can’t do this and that. When you acknowledge that you may be working against yourself you’re able to start working for yourself.

Step 2: Write down what self-doubt & the fear of failure have kept you from doing: Did you not take a class you know you needed because you thought it was too hard? Write it down. Did you not attend a more challenging school because you thought you wouldn’t be able to compete with the students there? Write it down. Did you not run for office in an organization because you were afraid you’d look bad if you lost? Write it down. You will be amazed at all the dreams you’ve abandoned while plagued with self-doubt and the fear of failure.

Step 3: Write down what your reasons were for not doing what you wanted: Right under each of your abandoned goals or actions write down why you chose not to pursue them. You may find that what once seemed like good reasons for your inaction now appears unimportant and silly. Now imagine what your life would be like had you done what your heart wanted. Imagine the path you’d be walking on. It’s probably the one you wish you were walking on now.

Step 4: Begin speaking positive things into existence: You are smart, you are attractive, you are creative, you are talented. You are worthy of a career twice as successful as you hope it will be, and it can be yours. What are you talking about? It will be yours! Start replacing the put-downs you feed yourself with words of encouragement and praise. Talk about what you can achieve and why you’re capable of achieving that and more. If you’re not feeling that, then you’ll have to fake it until you make it. When you wake up in the morning thank God for not giving you a spirit of self-doubt or the fear and then count your accomplishments one-by-one. After that, say aloud the goals you’ve made for your career and the qualities you have that will help you achieve them.

Step 5: Begin looking at opportunities in a new light: Once you’ve cut self-doubt and the fear of failure loose you may begin to see opportunities in a new light. What seemed risky may now appear exciting. What appeared too challenging may interest you now because you want to be challenged. You can now sift through all the plans you put in storage, or the garbage, and see which ones can still give your career the boost it needs. You’ll find that the potential you have in your career and in life is enormous if you just take advantage of it.